My Breast Implant Removal Journey
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In my life journey, I made many unconscious choices based on beliefs I held on to strongly about myself. Beliefs of not being enough, not feeling beautiful, not feeling loved and accepted led me to decide on getting breast implants.
Even though my physical appearance changed, the beliefs did not. So, I was still attracting situations in my life that reinforced those beliefs. And instead of addressing those deep shadows within me, I superficially addressed them with “enhancing” my body. This became counterproductive because in an effort to be seen, accepted and loved – I attracted men that only saw my body and created distance with other women, so the love I craved for was never fulfilled.
It was through my first plant medicine ceremony that I received the message to remove my implants. The images of toxins running through my body came flooding in and pain took over my chest. The messages were very clear – to return back to my natural Self. At first, it seemed a direct message about my physical appearance but what Grandmother Aya was asking me was to take a deeper look within and return to my essence.
This propelled a shift in my consciousness, and I began a journey of inner work – of Self-love and acceptance. Of looking at my deep-rooted beliefs and lack of self-esteem with curiosity and discovering how codependent I was on validation from others. But did I actually value myself for ME? The love I was seeking – did I love ME? Did I accept ME? Did I see ME?
Returning to my natural Self was an inside job; the healing started from within and eventually made its way into the decision of removing my breast implants. I realized that the love I longed for, was my very own and that I no longer wanted to show up in any way other than my authentic and natural Self.
I learned so much through this process – I discovered that my implants caused me to be in a coma and hospitalized for two weeks after six months of having them due to Toxic Shock Syndrome; I realized I had been experiencing breast implant illness symptoms and had developed an autoimmune disease, I was not breathing to my full capacity and most importantly – I had built a wall around my heart.
In retrospect, I wasn’t conscious at the time I made the decision to get my implants. My own beliefs and society’s beauty standards led me to that decision. However, it wasn’t a permanent one and I am grateful for it because it opened the doorway to a deeper relationship with my Self.
I am passionate about this journey and physical transformation is not the point. Returning to our natural state is an awakening, a new state of consciousness, a new awareness. It requires transfiguration and transmutation of our energy, patterns, fears and beliefs as women. It’s a re-birth of a whole new YOU.
If you would like to deepen the relationship with your Self and are ready to step into your most authentic BEING, I invite you to initiate the path of Returning to Your Natural Self, your true Divine Feminine essence – the path of opening your Heart.
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